“When choosing a long-term partner… you will inevitably be choosing a particular set of unsolvable problems that you’ll be grappling with for the next ten, twenty or fifty years.” –Dan Wiles.
Are you a newlywed?
Did you just get engaged?
Are you and your partner looking to take your relationship to the next level?
When you’re considering marriage, deciding on your honeymoon or figuring out where you want to live are among the first things you start to plan. Premarital counseling might be last on your list, if it’s there at all. While it’s not an engagement topic that’s very fun or romantic, premarital counseling can set your marriage up to succeed and survive long-term, in spite of the odds.
Premarital counseling can help you and your significant other improve your relationship by helping you develop better communication skills, learn conflict management, uncover your shared core values as well as identify differences that could create future conflict. Working with a therapist, you can discuss expectations with your partner that will help better prepare both of you for marriage.
So if these sound like you:
You and your partner have arguments that don’t get resolved
You feel like you’re always the one who has to compromise to keep the peace
You’re concerned about how your partner’s financial situation will affect you as a married couple
You’re worried about losing affection or having a diminished sex life after marriage
You want to find healthier ways to resolve conflict
You want to resolve religious or financial differences
You want to define your marital roles and expectations
… Then premarital counseling can be a great benefit to both you and your partner.
The intimate nature of marriage requires that you talk to your partner about everything, no matter how awkward or uncomfortable. Premarital counseling will help you learn how to be a better listener, and how to make your voice and needs heard in a productive and positive manner.
Premarital counseling will also show you how to handle conflict in your marriage. When you live with someone, you will have arguments ranging from the very mundane to more serious issues. How you argue will be a part of the story of how you are as a couple. Learn how to de-escalate arguments and how to fight fairly, so you don’t cause emotional pain from things you said that you’ll never be able to take back.
In pre-marital counseling, we will likely bring up topics that you’ve discussed with your partner previously, as well as subjects you hadn’t considered before. This fresh perspective from an objective third party will uncover new details from your partner. This is also an excellent time for us to find unexpected areas where you disagree, and give you the tools to handle possible future conflict.
Getting married is one of life’s most treasured experiences. Premarital counseling can help you and your partner turn that momentous occasion into a loving, lasting relationship. For guidance and support to strengthen your future marriage, please contact me today so I can schedule an appointment.