How to Deal with Infidelity in a Relationship
When infidelity occurs in a relationship, it can be very devastating for the parties involved. Cheating involves breaking a promise to be utterly faithful to your partner, and when it happens, it erases the trust that existed in the relationship. Dealing with infidelity can be pretty challenging, and it raises tough questions. Should you stay? Should you forgive? Can trust be rebuilt? Will things ever be the same? If you’ve just found out that your partner has been unfaithful and you’re unsure what to do, this article is for you.
It’s important to note that infidelity can occur in any relationship. We often think it’s never going to happen in our relationship, but existing statistics show that cheating occurs in about a third of relationships.
Why do people cheat?
People cheat for various reasons, and it rarely has anything to do with the person being cheated on. You might think your partner was unfaithful because of something you did or didn’t do, but that’s rarely true. Here are some reasons people cheat:
– To feel desirable
– Impulse/Lack of self-control
– Impaired decision-making under the influence of drugs or alcohol
– Sex compulsion
Remember that none of these reasons is an excuse, and the cheater made choices.
Can a relationship survive infidelity?
Yes, a relationship can survive infidelity, but it means that both partners have to be willing to work hard at rebuilding the trust that has been broken, healing, and making the relationship strong again.
Here are a few tips:
– Talk about the affair- Both parties must have an open and honest discussion. It also helps to talk to a relationship counselor together and explore ways that you both can heal faster.
– Remember the good times- Cheating is painful, but it helps to reminisce about the good times and all the beautiful things your partner did for you in the past.
– Tackle old issues- Now is a great time to tackle all the underlying issues in your relationship and create a fresh start.
– Practice radical honesty– Try to be completely honest with each other about how you feel and want to be loved.
– Set a timetable for recovery- Both of you need to be intentional about your recovery. The cheater must allow the betrayed party ample time to heal and honor the other person’s recovery process.
– Start something new- Remember how excited you both were when you just fell in love? Rekindle that magic by doing an activity you enjoy together and incorporating more romance into your relationship.
– Reaffirm your commitment- There needs to be an understanding that infidelity will never occur in the relationship again and a willingness to keep that promise by both parties.
In rebuilding a relationship damaged by infidelity, patience is vital. With the support of each other, family, friends, and a good therapist, a couple can move past an affair and become even stronger. I offer relationship counseling services for couples in this challenging situation, and you can contact me to book a session.