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  • 4 Essential Relationship Elements of a Lasting Love

    We’re taught to share and play well with others when we’re young. As adults, these early lessons don’t always translate into building and maintaining loving relationships.

    But it’s never too late to learn new life skills; creating healthy relationships is one of your best skills. The following are the essential relationship elements of a lasting love. If you can master these, you will set yourself up to experience an excellent relationship for the rest of your life.

    Create Trust and Mutual Respect

    Even the most loving of relationships will be tested every once in a while. All couples experience ups and downs and the stress of everyday life. The key is to not take that out on each other.

    Create a safe environment in your relationship where you can speak honestly and freely. Never interrupt, yell, or belittle the other person. Should things get too heated, step back and wait until things cool off.

    Don’t Judge

    “For better or for worse.” If you’re married, those are the words you agreed to. If you’re not married, you still partner with another human being with flaws and quirks just like you.

    It’s essential to accept your partner and not judge them too harshly. This doesn’t mean you have to like everything they do, and it doesn’t mean you can’t remind them every once in a while that they need to scoop the cat litter as well.

    But it does mean you should try to be as compassionate as possible. Compassion is the opposite of judgment, allowing you to be open and fully connect with the ones you love.

    Make Time for Each Other

    It’s far too easy to get busy and neglect the relationship. Many couples get to the point where they become more like roommates than a romantic couple. Don’t allow this to happen. Make time each week to check in with each other and reconnect.

    Be Responsible for Your Feelings

    No one can “fix us” or make us all better. We must heal ourselves from old wounds and scars (and we all have those!). Our partners should be there to support us in becoming whole, but ultimately, it is our responsibility to heal, not theirs.

    These guidelines can help you and your love stay a positive force in each other’s lives. But let’s face it, sometimes life can come at us, and before we know it, the relationship is on the rocks. At times like these, it can be beneficial to speak with a couple’s therapist who can guide you through the rough patch and get you reconnected.

    If you and your partner want to explore treatment options, please get in touch. I would be happy to discuss how I may be able to help.